Just cut your hair first
A young man comes home and says "Dad, just got my driver's license and would like to use the family car."
Father replies, :"O.K., son. But, first, you have to get good grades in school, keep your room clean, make the yard is neat, and cut your hair. Come back in a few months and then we'll see."
Well, several months pass and the young man comes into the house with his report card in his hand. "Dad, I got great marks on my report card. I've been keeping my room as neat as a pin, and the yard is always ship-shape. How about letting me use the car?"
Father replies, "That's all true, but son you didn't cut your hair."
Son says, "But, dad, Jesus had long hair."
Father replies, "Yes, son, you're perfectly right. And he walked everywhere he went."
A teacher asked one of her pupils, "Can you name our nation's capital?"
The reply was, "Washington DC"
When asked what the "DC" stood for, the pupil added, "Dot com!"
A man and his pet giraffe walk into a bar...
A man and his pet giraffe walk into a bar and start having a few quiet drinks. As the night goes on, they get pretty drunk. The giraffe finally passes out near the pool tables and the man decides to go home.
As the man is leaving, he's approached by the barman who says, "Hey, you're not gonna leave that lyin' here, are ya?"
"Hmph," says the man, "that's not a lion, it's a giraffe."
Freshman (finishing a letter) - "I'd send you that five I owe you, but I've already sealed the letter."
"Don't trouble yourself to stretch your mouth any wider," said a dentist to his patient, "I intend to stand outside to draw your tooth."
"It was so cold where we were," boasted the Arctic explorer, "that the candle froze and we couldn't blow it out."
"That's nothing," said his rival. "Where we were the words came out of our mouths in pieces of ice, and we had to fry them to see what we were talking about."
A young man comes home and says "Dad, just got my driver's license and would like to use the family car."
Father replies, :"O.K., son. But, first, you have to get good grades in school, keep your room clean, make the yard is neat, and cut your hair. Come back in a few months and then we'll see."
Well, several months pass and the young man comes into the house with his report card in his hand. "Dad, I got great marks on my report card. I've been keeping my room as neat as a pin, and the yard is always ship-shape. How about letting me use the car?"
Father replies, "That's all true, but son you didn't cut your hair."
Son says, "But, dad, Jesus had long hair."
Father replies, "Yes, son, you're perfectly right. And he walked everywhere he went."
A teacher asked one of her pupils, "Can you name our nation's capital?"
The reply was, "Washington DC"
When asked what the "DC" stood for, the pupil added, "Dot com!"
A man and his pet giraffe walk into a bar...
A man and his pet giraffe walk into a bar and start having a few quiet drinks. As the night goes on, they get pretty drunk. The giraffe finally passes out near the pool tables and the man decides to go home.
As the man is leaving, he's approached by the barman who says, "Hey, you're not gonna leave that lyin' here, are ya?"
"Hmph," says the man, "that's not a lion, it's a giraffe."
Freshman (finishing a letter) - "I'd send you that five I owe you, but I've already sealed the letter."
"Don't trouble yourself to stretch your mouth any wider," said a dentist to his patient, "I intend to stand outside to draw your tooth."
"It was so cold where we were," boasted the Arctic explorer, "that the candle froze and we couldn't blow it out."
"That's nothing," said his rival. "Where we were the words came out of our mouths in pieces of ice, and we had to fry them to see what we were talking about."